Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Depressed

Super fat (127.8 lbs!!!), stressed about the apartment (not renting it, renting it, having to clean it up, having to move stuff back to my parents) and going home. I want to cry, I want to go back to bed. But I won't. I'm going to go out. I don't know where yet. Maybe the gym, maybe the beach. Maybe the bakery with the purple malasadas I want to eat. I suck at not eating when I'm stressed out. I suck at moderating my intake of "allergy foods" (ate WAY too much plate lunch yesterday). I suck at being ok with leaving food on my plate, in the fridge, in the pantry. l feel bad I bought more food at Whole Foods last week, and now I feel like I have to eat it or take it home. Why don't I feel ok just leaving it? I don't know....

Ok, off to see the sunshine. I hope it makes me feel better about myself and my life.

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