Acceptance

One of the joys of my hotel room besides a lovely view of the hillside, the park I ran in this morning and the pool I wish I could go swim in is that I get to contemplate my body from all angles in the full length mirrors in the bathroom.

On one hand it horrifies me to look at my fleshiness. On the other hand, I realize that some people might find this more attractive than a stick thin, ripped woman.  Although that person isn't me, I also realize that the challenge is for me to accept and love myself regardless of what weight I carry on my bones. I don't have to like it, and I can change it, but it shouldn't make me hate myself.

I hope to grow to accept who I am, the plusses, the minuses, the things I can work on and the things I can't change.

I still want to lose weight but I want it to be because I'm becoming the best version of me I can be, not because I think I'm flawed as a person because I'm not thin.

Highs today (at 2:55 p.m. Barcelona time):

- Coke with real sugar in it available at the hotel!
- Screwing up the courage to continue to talk to a CVP even though I made a bad impression with my first comment to him.
- Making connections with new people at work, and one of them offering to send his favorite restaurant reco for Milan
- Sunshine on my face